Disappointed in God

It was just one line in a sermon, but it hit hard. "One way to never be disappointed in life is to expect little."

How many of us have been disappointed in God? How many of us have hoped for big things, only to have God fail to deliver? Sound familiar?

I wonder how many of us learn to keep our expectations of God and grace and hope low so we won't be disappointed again. I wonder how many of us have grown to expect little of God, because we have not seen God step into our lives in big ways.

I'll say it: God doesn't treat me the way I think God should. God doesn't treat me the way I would treat me if I were God.

But, I have learned not to let my disappointments keep my hopes and expectations low. I read in scripture: For who among us knows what pertains to a person except the spirit of the person that is within? Similarly, no one knows what pertains to God except the Spirit of God. We have not received the spirit of the world but the Spirit that is from God, so that we may understand the things freely given to us by God (1 Cor. 2:11-12)

I think to dream big is to accept that I do not understand the spirit of God. I think to hope for great things means to accept my limitations in understanding.

For when God disappoints, I can shut down and expect less. Or I can look at my understanding and realize its needs: its need to move beyond the spirit that is from the world that wants signs and wonders; its need to move into the spirit that is in God, which sees things the world cannot see.

For only when I enter into that Spirit, will I begin to understand the things freely given to me by God. I will see things in a different light. I will see what I thought were disappointments, and understand. I will know in a different way.