Tuesday, August 27, 2013

A loss that remains



Loss. I have had as many losses as others. Lost dreams, lost goals, lost hope. Most losses I have experienced meant opening another door and moving forward in a different direction.

But there is one loss that is different. It is just a loss...with no door to open or new place to move. That loss came when my mother died.

When a parent dies, specifically, when you lose your mother, a door closes. You find that you become the older adult. You become the next in line to die. And death becomes more real, in a very different way. It is as though the line towards death has taken a major step forward. And you are next.

I have used this very real and deep lose to ponder. I have asked myself if I am ready, when it comes. I have looked over my priorities to see if they are in line with what I say is important in my life. And I have sought to appreciate my family more.

As I move forward, the loss remains. No matter what happens in life, my mother is gone and will not be able to appreciate or encourage me in that tangible way that meant so much to me. That is just a fact. That is life.

Some losses are permanent.


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