The problem of fear

There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out all fear because fear has to do with punishment, and so one who fears is not yet perfect in love. (1 Jn 4:18) John Tauler writes Be sure that if you do lack this sign, namely, confidence in love’s final rescue of your distressed soul – then all other signs together are deceitful. How do we deal with these words? After all, most, if not all of us, know fear.

I ponder the power of fear – and the emotions that stem from it – insecurities, inability to accept oneself – lack of courage – trust – foresight. And then I delve into Olivier Clément’s book “On Being Human” and read: Then we discover the basic truth about ourselves, that we are loved, and it is because we are loved that we exist. Love has always been offered as the cure of our fear. Love is what allows us to trust and have courage.

And yet, this is not a totally satisfactory answer. It seems, as I read the Gospels, that just coming to Jesus, just stepping into a spiritual life, results in fearful events: Think of the disciples. Before Jesus they lived a normal life. Once they began to follow Jesus, their lives changed and they were confronted with insecurities and confusions they had never known. It culminated those last days of Jesus’ life, when fear overtook them, and they fled in the garden, not to be seen at the trial or the crucifixion. They certainly had love. But they also had fear.

Perhaps we misunderstand what fear is about. Perhaps we have some romantic concept of what it means to be a follower of Jesus, someone for whom the seas part and the blessings flow. But scripture gives no indication of this kind of earthly paradise.

I think that fear is simply a part of our journey, and that it begins when we begin to discover our true selves, the fact that we are indeed very human. I do not think that it will ever be fully cast out. I believe that love makes us realize fear has no real power over us unless we let it. Fear can remind us that we are still wanderers on our way, but love will keep us going forward. When fear comes with new revelations about myself, love will help me know it is okay to be imperfect, to be vulnerable, and to be human. In a sense, fear is part of my natural condition, and it is never going to be fully conquered. I channel and control it by  my faith, making it powerless to destroy my life.

Perfect love cast out all fear only in the Kingdom. Here on earth, it will be my companion. It is up to me to make it subservient to my faith and hope. It is up to me to keep it from having any power over me.