Generosity. It warms the heart and inspires everyone around. But giving also has its backlash: regrets.
God loves a cheerful giver we read in 2 Corinthians 9:7. But immediately before this statement, we read Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. So give...not grudgingly or of necessity.
The writer of Corinthians is addressing the fact that even though we know good deeds will be repaid bountifully, we are also warned against the inner demon who begrudges even while she reaches out.
I think this speaks to how little we really know our own heart.
When we read another scripture passage that says, When you give, do not let your right hand know what your left hand is doing (Mt 6:3), we should think of our divided selves. For we do tend to reach out with one hand and take back with the other. We do live divided. And sometimes our giving is separated; we give, and then turn and wish we hadn't.
All of this speaks to our disparity. The more I read through the gospels, the more I see Jesus trying to convince us that union of body and soul takes work and consciousness. We tend to live divided, to act without our soul being truly involved. Such action leads to regret, anger and resentment. Jesus is telling us, look inward, test the spirit, learn your heart by self-reflection and honesty. The union is not automatic. It is a conscious and deliberate act.
If we take Jesus' lead, we will attend to our dilemma of dividedness.We will attend to our soul. We will seek to unite.
Then, when we give, it will be without regrets.
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