What to Do When we Fail to Find

 I think one of my favorte gospel stories comes from John 6:66. Jesus has just explained to the crowd that he is the bread of life. Many followers are confused and even scandalized. They turn from Jesus and walk away. Jesus turns to his own twelve, and says those sorrowful words, "Will you also go away?" And Peter answers, "Lord, to whom shall we go?"

I think there are times in our lives when we are tempted to give it all up. We often blame betrayal by those we put our trust. But that is not the real reason we would give up believing in something or someone. It is always deeper. Giving up implies a surrender, a failure to find, or a total misunderstanding of what was promised. It happens to all of us at some time in our life. It isn't so much a crisis of faith as it is a new insight into its flaws. And we are shaken.

By now we are all aware that faith does not protect us from evil. It does not save us from harm. It is not a shield to guard us, nor does it always hand us the strength we want and need. When we reailze this, we too are tempted to "go away".

What is marvelous about Peter's answer is, he was just as mystified by Jesus words as the others. He didn't know the answer, he couldn't see any better. But what Peter did have that many others did not, was the knowledge that it wasn't going to get any better by leaving.

To whom shall we go? In other words, well, Lord, this following you is pretty scary. You speak in riddles, you do things that are against the law. You live like a bum and perform miracles like a magician. But Lord, though I don't understand it all, I know that you are leading us to something new, something exalted. And I don't have to understand it totally to know that your words will give us light. Not all at once. But if I stay with you, I shall gradually understand, and gradually see, and gradually experience true life.

Stay with Jesus until you experience the goodness he has to offer, and your heart says, "Lord, it is good for us to be here." And you will be so glad you did not go away.