The challenge of truth

Who do you say that I am? The question is direct, and it begs for honesty. What Jesus is really asking is have you discovered the truth for yourself?  Or are you basing your opinion of me on what others are saying? 

The same question can be applied to our image of ourselves. Who do I say that I am?  Is my image formed by what others say of me, what people tell me I am, what I imagine I am? Or have I discovered my own truth?

The question is important because we cannot make the spiritual journey without first entering into the cell of self-knowledge, which is necessary if we hope to go deeper into truth. It means to discover the authentic self, not from the image others give me, or even that I give to myself, but from my destiny.

Sometimes we look with envy at what someone else is doing because we fear to become what we are destined to be. We find every excuse to deny our own potential because we fear the pain, the demands, the sacrifice it takes to accept our own truth.  It is easier to let what others say I am be enough. But it is never enough. To remain an image is to remain hollow.

Self-knowledge requires serious reflection, self-reflection, prayer, courage, and acceptance. It demands authenticity. Only serious souls will journey down that path and not settle for less.

The whole of faith is built upon truth. It starts with self-knowledge. So, who do I say that I am?

Value of Vulnerability

We know we are on a quest in life. Yet, we do grow tired of the seeking. I think one of our problems comes from our culture. We like to possess, to accomplish, to arrive. And yet the very nature of quest is longing, seeking, journey. I find this in myself, the desire to "arrive" and find myself sometimes stressed with continued seeking, especially when things are dark.

Llewellyn Vaughan-Lee speaks to this kind of attitude, attributing it to our masculine vs feminine side. He notes our quest is goal-oriented, and that masculine values even dominate our spiritual quest: we seek to be better, to improve ourself, to get somewhere. We have forgotten the feminine qualities of waiting, listening, being empty (24). I find these words ring true for me.

Perhaps some of these problems stem from our concept of waiting. For us modern people, waiting is more of a punishment, an inconvenience, a test. Waiting implies some sort of failure to arrive. Possession is seen as our accomplishment. And not to have possession implies emptiness.

Yet, much happens in waiting. We do more self-reflection while waiting than in possession. We are more attentive, more alert, more filled with desire. Waiting also increases our yearning. Vaughan-Lee  says longing awakens us to our own need,a need which we can never satisfy, and so we become infinitely vulnerable, exposed to this need.

 None of us like to be vulnerable. Yet, isn't that our true state? The secret to accepting vulnerability is to stay aware of our protector, the all-present ALL. Only then will yearning bear fruit. Only then will we see value in waiting.