Disappointed in God

It was just one line in a sermon, but it hit hard. "One way to never be disappointed in life is to expect little."

I wonder how many of us have been disappointed in God. I wonder how many of us then hope for less, because it is safer.

I'll say it: God doesn't treat me the way I think God should. God doesn't treat me the way I would treat me if I were God.

I, too, struggle not to let my disappointments keep my hopes and expectations low. I read in scripture: For who among us knows what pertains to a person except the spirit of the person that is within? Similarly, no one knows what pertains to God except the Spirit of God. We have not received the spirit of the world but the Spirit that is from God, so that we may understand the things freely given to us by God (1 Cor. 2:11-12).

I have come to believe that part of dreaming big is accepting the raw fact that I do not understand the spirit of God. And when I hope for great things, I constantly remind myself I need to accept my limitations in understanding.

For it has happened that when God disappointed, I shut down and expected less. I have slowly worked on examining my understanding. I find I often have the spirit of the world that wants signs and wonders; I need to move into the spirit that is in God, which sees things the world cannot see.

For only when I enter into that Spirit, will I begin to understand the things freely given to me by God. I will see my disappointments and not let them make me expect any less.