Refusing to carve it in stone

Deuteronomy 5:8 instructs You shall not make for yourself any graven image. We are prone to interpret that as false gods, the kind the early Israelites made and set up before themselves and worshipped.

But is that the true meaning of Deuteronomy 5:8?

I think not. I think it is telling us, don't take an incident, an action, a thought or a value and hold on to it as thought it alone is true. Because that is carving it in stone. And life is not like that.

That is death.

Life is change. Life is learning. Life is journey.

I think that is one of the many reasons why we are urged to forgive. Because to refuse to forgive is in effect saying that that one action, that one incident, is carved into my memory. I will never let that memory go. I will always look at that person in light of that one action. And that too is death. 

We do the same with opinions. We get an opinion, and then we hold on to it, and refuse to see some other value or way of looking at something. In effect, we have carved it into stone and then worshipped our ideal as true.

And any graven image is a dead image.

To refuse to carve an image in stone is to honor life.

I have heard it said that if we say we know someone like a book, then we really don't know that person at all. Because we are not books. We are human beings.

And so, beware of setting in stone. It is the opposite of growth, enlightenment, and transformation.

The benefits of forgiveness

Forgiveness allows tranquility to envelope the soul

I found it quite interesting that the article on forgiveness was not in a religious magazine. No, it was in Counseling Today, the ACA magazine for licensed, professional, clinical counselors. I'd like to quote a couple lines here.

What stands between many clients and a happy life is the often-elusive process of forgiveness.

Blockages people struggle with in their lives were linked to some sort of issue for which they needed to forgive someone.

Forgiveness isn't about the other person or about making someone else apologize or change--it is about setting yourself free.

Not forgiving creates an emotional prison, ties you to a person or an event that usually you would rather forget but are unable to.

I could go on. But I think the above quotes demonstrates quite well that forgiveness is about me, not about the other person. For when I failed to forgive, I become the prisoner, chained to the person or event I will not let go. Refusing to forgive keeps me very small, and small means many things: bitter, resentful, jealous, angry, hateful, stuck.

When Jesus said, forgive others as you want God to forgive you, he was in effect trying to remind me to keep balanced. Just as I do things that need forgiving, so too do others. Do not expect them to be something I cannot be.

Finding an article on forgiveness in a counseling magazine shows just how far reaching resentments can go. I do so much harm to myself when I refuse to forgive.

So the next time someone hurts or offends me, maybe my question should be, "Do I want to punish and damage myself over this?" If the answer is no, then it is time to let go.

 

Healing from 9/11

Come, let us return to the Lord, For it is he who has rent, but he will heal us; he has struck us, but he will bind our wounds. Hosea, 6:1.

As we remember 9/11, we will again be subjected to images of all the horrific events that happened that day. As we watch, we cannot help but be moved, with emotions stirring up our hearts and souls. How to handle these powerful feelings? For in remembering 9/11, we remember also the hateful deed, the senseless deaths, the destruction, fear, and lack of respect for life. In watching the tapes of 9/11 events, we shall be re-living the event all over again, ten years later. And our heart will beg us...please, help me to heal from such a deep wound.

Return to the Lord, Hosea says, and he will heal us. We return when we learn the Divine act of forgiveness. It is forgiveness that takes us into the very essence of God. It is forgiveness that transforms us. To forgive, we must relinquish our anger, and refuse to nurture it endlessly. For anger is an infection. As we read in the Book of Sirach 28:3: Could anyone nourish anger against another and expect healing from the Lord?

As the images are shown again and again this weekend, let us make the conscious choice to forgive. Let not the injury done against us keep us in hatred and with a continuous desire for revenge. For only forgiveness can turn the senseless death of those caught in the towers, in the pentagon, or in the hijacked planes into a powerful witness, born out of our own souls.

Let us honor the tenth anniversary of 9/11 by returning to the Lord.

For only the Divine One can heal us and make us whole again.

 

The True Struggle with Injuries

Santiago Trail, Cahors France

We've all heard it said. It isn't so much what happens to you in life but how you deal with it.

And it is true: we do need to deal with things, to process what happens.

But I think our greater struggle comes from the hidden anger we have with ourselves And I believe that is why we have such a hard time letting go. Though we say someone betrayed or misrepresented or whatever they did to us, something bothers us more. If we stopped and were really honest,  I bet we would hear ourselves saying Why did I believe what she said? Why do I trust people so? When will I learn? 

Perhaps that's why forgiveness is so hard for us. Perhaps when it comes to forgiveness, the hardest person to forgive is myself.

Act as Divine

Forgiveness. It is the hall mark of the Christian, and of anyone following a compassionate spirituality. There are many ways to look at this act, as one bigger and more generous than the other, as one compassionate, or as one acknowledging human frailty and giving others what I want myself.

I believe forgiveness central to any spirituality. Without it the heart becomes hard, closed and vindictive. Central to forgiveness is not just compassion, but common sense. Forgiveness of another's wrong says I don't judge a whole person's life by one act or deed, or a set of acts or deeds. I don't paint a person by one stroke of a brush or one incident. Who of us could survive if we are only perceived by our wrong acts?

Forgiveness isn't just necessary for spiritual health, it is also an important component of mental health. Failure to forgive breeds all sorts of emotional problems: bitterness, vindictiveness, paranoia, and guilt to name a few. Why should we carry this burden on our hearts when we can free ourselves through forgiving the offense? Keeping it alive means letting it grow, fester and becomes infected with exaggerations. It is time consuming, energy depleting, and destructive to our soul.

So let us each make a pledge that no offense or injury is worth ruining our lives. I can see a person more clearly when I let go the offense of that person. Let it go, and let not that act define that person, or burden my heart. Let it go because we all mess up once in a while, and cannot endure our own judgments. Let it go because we need and want the breath of life that forgiveness brings. For to forgive is to act as the Divine

A Vision that Pierces Darkness

Forgiveness. It's the christian attitude that stumps most, even those who call themselves christian. It isn't a condescending pardon. It isn't a passive acceptance. It deals with more than letting go, though that too is necessary. Forgiveness is a type of vision, a realization, an acknowledgment of our human condition. Forgiveness comes only when I realize that I am not all that different from the one I must forgive.

We understand the true attitude of forgiveness from one of the most common of prayers, the Our Father. Forgive us we pray as we forgive those who sin against us. Forgiveness is not just ours to give, but ours to receive. As such, it is an acknowledgment that just as this one has done something offensive against me, so I too, willingly or unwillingly, knowingly or unknowingly, have done to others. Forgiveness portrays our vision of this earthly condition we all share. After all, we are all capable of misrepresenting truth, of selfishness, egoism, and worst of all, arrogance. To stand in judgment of someone who is in denial of these things is to stand in denial ourselves. For unforgiveness is darkness.

If you seek to prepare your heart this Advent season, find a way to empty it of revenges and resentment. For forgiveness isn't about the person who has offended. It is about my ability to pierce the darkness around me and see life for what it really is, to see my place in the scheme of things, to know that, but for some quirk of nature, I could easily be the very one I need to forgive.