An extraordinary gift

I was newly moved to a bigger monastery. I felt lost, lonely, and isolated. I said a little prayer, one that I did not really expect to be answered. I asked if I could just see a kitty, just hear one meow. A couple days later, the workman came to see me and said, "Look what I found!" and pulled a scrawny little kitten about 4 weeks old out of his coat pocket. "We found it in the leaves," he said. I could not believe my eyes. I was even more shocked when I was allowed to keep the little guy. I named him Buttons.

When it became clear that I needed to leave the monastery and the monastic way of life, I asked if I could keep Buttons. The answer was an overwhelming yes. I moved to live with my brother in Texas. Buttons was with me. When I moved back to Massachusetts, Buttons came too. He moved with me every time I found it necessary to relocate. I could not imagine life without him. He was always there when I came home, greeting me at the front door. I used to wonder how he knew when I had arrived. Then I just got used to having him there at the door when I unlocked it. He was better than a dog!

Buttons hated riding in the car, but I took him with me whenever I went away for several months. He would adjust to the temporary home, always coming out at night to sleep on my feet. I got so use to him being there, it became part of going to sleep at night.

And Buttons was a smart cat. I tried endlessly to outsmart him, with very little success. He won 99% of the time. I accepted this, as this is what it means to be an owner of a cat. You have to accept their superiority!

On Monday Dec. 10, Buttons had come to the end of his road. I had to let him go...

When I got up this morning,  I looked for Buttons, but he was not there. And then I remembered. I will continue to expect him to greet me at the door after a long day away...to come out to see what I'm doing when I am working in the living room, to keep my feet warm when I got to bed. I will continue to deal with this loss, which is very deep for me.  And I will continue to thank God for answering my prayer...

For it was when I was lost and lonely that God gave me the gift of a forlorn ferral kitten. We were rigth for each other. And for 14 years, we made the greatest pair.

Buttons, I will miss you always....

When God steps in...

There are times in our lives when we look around and wonder, where is God? Does God care about what's happening in my life right now? What about this 'Good Shepherd' or 'Loving Being' who is suppose to watch over me?

I have had many of those times. But I have also had times when God's hand was so obvious, so tangible, that I thought I would never again doubt. I'd like to share one of these moments.

Last winter a family member asked me if I would travel cross country to help her build her deck. "I'll pay your plane fare," she said, enticing me. "Okay," I responded. I went online and ordered my ticket. $410.

I flew across during Spring Break. We worked every evening and by the last day, we had gotten the deck leveled, framed and everything done but the last boards of decking. But my time was up and I had to go. As we sat at the kitchen table the night before I was to leave, my sister brought out her check book. "It was $410, right?" she asked, poised to write the check. I looked at her in silence. The last few days, a nagging thought had come again and again. I should not take my sister's money. She had two boys, and worked as a waitress. As a single mother, she sacrificed a lot for her kids.

"I don't think you should write the check," I finally said, obeying my inner promptings.

"What? But you can't afford this! You have no money!"

Well, she was right about that. The temptation to accept was powerful.

"No," I said in reply. "I need to do this."

"Well, then let me pay half," she continued. The offer truly was enticing. But that nagging inner voice said 'no'.  

I hesitated. Should I? Or should I not? Finally I said, "No, I should just do this for you because you are my sister. God will take care of me, you watch. God always does."  My sister looked at me, first with eyes of hesitation, then with clear gratitude. 

She took me down to the airport and dropped me off at the curb. My young nephews were in tears that I was leaving. It had been a good time. I walked into the terminal and found my gate. As I was about to claim a seat, an announcement came over the intercom. "If anyone has a flexible schedule and can give up their seat, you will be rewarded." I jumped up and went to the counter.

"I can give up my seat," I said.

"Okay," replied the airline official. "We will give you a $400 voucher that you can use on any other flight, expires in one year. And we will book your flight back on another airline, first class. Please wait while we make the changes."

I stood there dumbfounded. I had barely left my sister's house when God gave me not just the $400 back, but a First Class ticket as well.

I called my sister right away to share the good news.

I used the $400 voucher to fly out to attend my brother's wedding.

And now, when I am tempted to stress out about my situation, I try to recall God's goodness, and this example pops into mind.

Yes, God is good.