Metanoia Bringing Peace

We all like beginnings, especially when what we have isn't worth keeping. The chance to make a fresh start has inspired songs, poems and lives.

New beginnings is what metanoia is all about. And it happens every time you make it happen. You don't have to wait until a new year draws near, or a new month, or a new day. It can start right now.

Metanoia means turning around, change of heart, conversion. In plain language, metanoia is an ancient way of reminding ourselves that we are not set in cement. We have and can and should turn our face toward the face of God every time the thought comes to us. Each turning brings our souls and minds closer to the unseen reality of the Divine. And you can not come close to the Divine without it changing you in some way.

Metanoia. Turn, O soul, toward the light. Turn where grace is found. Turn and see, for life is better than you first understood. Turn to glimpse the Divine in readiness to take your hand and lead. Turn that you may walk the path destined for you. Turn that you may let his face shine upon you and give you peace.

Who Do I say I am?

Who do you say that I am? These words of Jesus can make all of us pause, if only for a moment. Perhaps we should turn the question around and say, who do I say that I am?

Often our image of ourselves carries a bit of distance from reality. It's easy to spot in others. A bit harder to spot in me. But sometimes those images come together, and seem a "fit" for who we should be. We can spend years following an image we've accepted of ourselves, only to find, in the end, that it isn't.

What makes my image? What people tell me I am? What I imagine I am? These are questions for real soul searching. And, of course, attempting to be that image. But sometimes I let the image of who I think I should be replace the authentic me.

Sometimes we look with envy at what someone else is doing, envy because we secretly admire that person, but envious because we find every excuse to deny our own potential in following our dream. Sometimes we remain the image others have of us because becoming our own self is too painful, too new, too hard to adjust to. So we cling instead of letting go. How shall we ever find our real self? By serious reflection. By courage. By acceptance of failure when the "image" doesn't work.

Who do I say that I am?

The Wholeness of Imperfection

Wholesome. It's a word we see more and more these days. The dictionary defines it as comprising the full quantity, amount, extent, number, etc., without diminution or exception; entire, full, or total.  It connotes healthy, nutritious, organic, balanced. It should also be a key word for each of us in our search for an authentic spiritual life.

Whole makes us think of oneness, of all the parts meshing together naturally. It also makes us think that all is above reproach, nothing damaged, nothing tainted. Yet in the spiritual life, that would be false. For there is not one person alive who could claim perfection. And in spirituality, wholeness does not translate into perfect. It translates into acceptance of what is.

None of us comes of age without a certain amount of baggage. We can spend a great deal of our lives working to deny it or cover it. But that too lacks the "wholeness" vision.

What we forget is that "perfection" is a myth, not a reality. Our woundedness does not damage or destroy our wholeness, only our lack of acceptance and willingness to work with it. We sense immediately when someone presents herself to us as perfect, that it is only a sham, that the truth is not being told, that life is being presented very superficially.

Authenticity requires that we accept our woundedness. Who is more beautiful than the soul that lets her authenticity shines through her words and actions, without guile or pretense? And spiritual wholeness requires we accept all facets of ourselves, the pleasant and the unpleasant. Only then can we be "whole".

Be whole. Accept your whole person. Then you can be truly free.

Authentic Freedom

Jesus says in John 16:13: Unless I go away, the Counselor will not come to you; but if I go, I will send him to you. And we are all familiar with the quote: How hard it is for those who have wealth to enter the Kingdom of God! Mk 12:25.

Why does Jesus speak often about letting go and giving up? Can we not enjoy the material possession life gives us? Or is he speaking of something else, some deeper, something more fundamental?

I think Jesus is trying to teach us a different attitude toward life. I think this attitude is not just toward material possessions, but more importantly, toward doing good deeds.

Face it. We all get a lot a great deal of human satisfaction from the good deeds that we do. But doing good deeds for good feelings can end disastrously. How? Because, as someone has said, no good deed goes unpunished. What will keep us going when our good deeds are misjudged, unappreciated, even condemned? How will we continue doing good? Will we not drop it all and wonder, why did I bother?

Jesus knows we love doing actions for rewards, so he invites us to follow him for a deeper reason: simply because it is the right thing to do. Joy will follow. But if joy is our goal, we will fall flat on our face.

That's the catch. When we choose to follow Jesus, and our choice is not rewarded with that deep sense of fulfillment, we must go inside of our souls reflect on our intentions. Are we doing this for personal satisfaction? Or are we doing the right thing because it is right?  Only when we discern this, can we experience a true freedom.  And after all, isn't that what following Jesus should be about?

Dreamers Pursuing their Dreams

We read in scripture that the Joseph of the Old Testament was quite the dreamer. His dreams did not just humor him; they predicted his future. Joseph of the New Testament dreamed as well. His dreams often answered the nagging questions in his heart. Both Josephs discerned their dreams, and listened to them. Through belief, they came to see the dreams come true.

Hans Selye is quoted as saying realistic people with practical aims are rarely as realistic and practical in the long run of things as the dreamers who pursue their dreams.

If the Gospels has anything to teach us, it is to believe. And part of believing comes through being able to dream...of what could be, of what we are meant to be, of where life can take us. Dreams can be the doorways to wonderful changes in our lives, to great events, to important opportunities, to new levels. We obtain only what we work for. And we work for what we believe in. Do we look at the future in unrealistic terms? Or are our dreams based on present day realities? To live the dream requires stepping forward and risking. We can't sit back and just wish.

What are your dreams? More importantly, what are you doing to make them come true?

Answers Transformed

In thinking over Clyde Crews question on answers, I've been thinking about his question ...why isn't the meaning of things clear...agreeable and available to all?

This is one of the mysteries of life; that a meaning that satisfies you does not satisfy me. Or even, that a meaning once solid for me has become more like shifting sand, and I must search for something deeper or more concrete.

Why answers don't work forever is a mystery to me. I know that truth is unchangeable. But I conclude our understanding of truth must grow even as we grow, must change even as we change. And that when an understanding has reached a climax in a particular answer, then we must find a better answer.

All of this must seem very abstract. Here is a concrete example. Early on in my religious life, I held to one notion of suffering. That notion consisted in the phrase, "Carry your cross" and "God will never give you more than you can bear." These concepts espoused a great truth, that there is value in suffering. For years, this truth sufficed when life became challenging.

Then, along came a period of intense darkness. Life became confusing, and the pain intense. Suddenly the very words that had sustained me earlier in life failed me. In fact, not only were the meanings lost on me, but the words actually seemed accusatory. I searched for something more, something deeper, something with a better answer. I finally found it in words spoken to me by someone else, words taken from Romans "For those who love God, all things work together for good." The shift is sutle, but it totally changed my concept of pain and suffering. From passive acceptance, I learned to focus rather on the good that could result.

That is my story of an answer that transformed over time. Maybe you have such an example to share. I'd be interested in hearing about it.

Testing the Answers

In reading Clyde Crews book, Ultimate Questions, I like his statement No one escapes questioning; and in good measure we are defined in life and even in death by the nature of our own personal response (3). I would go one step further and say that we cannot truly answer the question until we understand it.

I once chatted with someone suffering great emotional distress. As she talked, she made the statement, "They keep giving me tools. I don't want tools, I want answers." A chill ran down my spine because I knew, life isn't so much about answers as it is about living the questions. You can get a generic answer, but it will never satisfy your particular journey. In fact, I'll go so far as to maintain that until you make the question your own, no answer will ever fully satisfy.

Even then, answers that are particular to you will work only for a time. For as you change and grow, you will understand the question differently, and will need a better response.Of course, this will happen only if you are living the question! If you stay with general questions, you can accept and live by generic answers.

But if you are forever deepening your understanding of God, you will see life in different lights as you journey. Because as we come to know God better, we understand the questions differently.

So maybe the better statement is how well are you living the questions of life? Are you delving deeper into the mystery of being, of the why and the how? Are you willing to sit with your questions until your answers come?